What is ancestral healing?

Ancestral healing is all about freedom. Freedom for them from trauma, contractions, expectations, burdens etc. Freedom for you to choose, do and make choices for things that were outside your ability, beyond choice and consciousness before.

For you the person alive right now, it is about freedom choose for what you want, in spite of all the family and internal noise directing to do otherwise. If you are labelled the “black sheep in the family” you will know this pattern/concept. You will know the frustrations of the way your family are, they might be limiting or out-of-control, or the “family-way” just drives you crazy. You may wish to stay more and more isolated from them. But in some way, you can’t stop thinking about them. And for those living right now, you’ve probably done a lot of work trying to fix yourself, but you just can’t seem to get things resolved and freely move on with the way you want to live. An ancestral healing journey starts in the now as unresolvable frustration and an intention by one person in a family to finding a different way to live. Worth noting is this feeling compulsion.

For the ancestors, it’s about:

  1. acknowledging there is a problem
  2. conceptualising it
  3. releasing beliefs, hold-outs pride and so much more
  4. resolutions not thought possible
  5. inclusion
  6. community
  7. letting the living representatives in the family direct things
  8. resting-in-peace, enjoy well-being in ancestral realms, offering insight, wisdom and love to those living representatives in the family.

Ancestral Healing for the living is all about:

  1. An already established healing journey where healing eludes the person
  2. Acknowledgement and connecting with your ancestors.
  3. Conceptualising the problem clearly. Sometimes you have to meet your ancestors first to see clearly what your problem is.
  4. Perspective – seeing the perspective of hidden elements and aspects
  5. Processing of inter-related points seen now in a new perspective
  6. Resolving what was considered un-fixable
  7. Tenacity and Responsibility – to endure may be the hardest healing crisis and journey of your life, or so far in life.
  8. Inclusion, well-being, life-force, self-knowledge, resolve
  9. Freedom to live in a new way, free of whatever, able to make choices not-even-conceivable at the start of this healing journey.
Ancestral Healing Stakeholders

All this happens in the context for whatever went on in their time, in meaningful resolutions that suit them, not overlaying our expectations and paradigms. The ancestors lived in very different times with sometimes very different paradigms of what right, tolerable and intolerable. So in the acknowledging, we connect now with them in the time and events that yearn to be healed. In the releasing much of the invested energy in this “family-issue” enables the ancestral group and their community at that time and point to see the events more for what they were, to release old contractions and a simple clarity dawns within the group for the first time. For the first time!

Conceptualisation and clarity of what was not ‘experienced or yearned for, desired’ in contrast to what happened. This is important and often in some groups of ancestors it offers this insight that what they wanted in their time was just not possible, it was “before it’s time”, and it is at this moment where the living representative gets new clarity on what they want with their life and “WOW that is what my ancestor wanted also!”

Finally the resolution involves the ancestors and their community in their time. Just like the old saying, “It takes a community to raise a child”, a resolution that involves the community so all can rest, rest-in-peace if you like. When this happens a palpable movement in the family occurs. The old-guard, the ancestors have relaxed and allow those living today to live with the freedom they want. Freedom to direct their life as they wish.

Self responsibility.

This is a journey into your enormity and awesomeness. The enormity of who you are also includes the experiences of your ancestors sitting on your DNA as epigenetics (on top of genes).

Some systems hand problematic energies back to the ancestors. It’s an interesting thing todo really as their energy has visited those in their family today because they could not heal it, release it, resolve it, bury it. If something keeps reappearing in your life today, and no matter how much work you do on it, you can’t seem to move past the paradigm you’re stuck in, that’s a very strong sign there are energies in the family that are yearning to be resolved. The fact you’re here reading this material shines light on the point that you’ve arrived here because you’re searching, seeking digging because you have this knowing that “I can live better without this paradigm operating and maybe you’ve even formulated an intention on how you really want to live. If you have, we strongly want you to explore this concept that “you are the one.”  Ancestral healing involves healing trauma, just not sending problematic things and containerising them with the ancestors, however, it is important to note here it can be a tactic in a bigger healing event, where you need to settle or make a client more coherent as to commence a healing journey. Be sure to come back and resolve this ‘containerisation’ later.

Deep-background experiences.

For some, the healing journey is more about the experience, but for others, it’s about a knowing. This is sometimes a long healing journey. This need to know forces a depth of comprehension and self-responsibility. Often, someone who wants to incarnate to grow and heal with a specific theme/experience, they will choose a family line that has that piece of juicy dynamic prevailing, or the perfect conditions if you like. So they incarnate into a family which has and develops all the right conditions for that healing journey. The ancestral line then seemingly sees this yearning and leans in on that individual to resolve what they could not. “You are just right for the job.” The experience of it might seem the opposite, as you forget what you come to experience and grow through when you incarnate, and then you get hit with these problems of the family, but you’ve forgotten what you wanted prior to birth. If other family members can’t see the problem/s in the family then it can seem helpless to do anything but propagate that.


So you might discover on your ancestral healing journey that is it you that will lead this family line to a new paradigm, in that part of life or living. And doing so, do you not think some ancestors would be cheering? Already you’ve heard those internal conversations or knowings that ‘how dare you be so audacious to reach for something that is not acceptable or too selfish!’

So it takes leadership to undertake such a healing in the family. It takes tenacity to get through all that family noise and push when it gets hard, not yielding to the family way. True ancestral healing is the hardest thing you will do in life. Many ancestors in this journey will resist you moving forward on this path, as it’s unknown to them, not safe, even perceived as selfish and decadent. They will resist you let alone your own mind and body which is programmed to keep you safe and live and nothing more.

So whilst the path for most is arduous, this path of responsibility of safely leading the family to a new paradigm is a journey of self-discovery. You discover the enormity of yourself, your power, selflessness and being able to stand as a torchbearer in the family group. It is a classical journey of becoming a leader, only to find out you always were. Let’s say that again: “only to find out you always were the leader”, but you just lost sight of it.

Hellinger quote:

“The so-called ‘Black Sheep’ of the family are, in fact, seekers of liberation roads for the family tree. Those members of the tree who do not adapt to the rules or traditions of the family system, those who were constantly seeking to revolutionize beliefs, going in contrast to roads marked by family traditions, those criticized, tried and even rejected, those, by General, they are called to release the tree of repetitive stories that frustrate entire generations. The ‘Black Sheep’, those who do not adapt, those who scream rebel, repair, detoxify and create a new and blooming branch… countless unfulfilled desires, unfulfilled dreams, frustrated talents of our ancestors manifest themselves in their rebellion looking to take place . The family tree, by inertia, will want to continue to maintain the castrating and toxic course of its trunk, which makes its task difficult and conflicting… that no one makes you doubt, take care of your ‘rarity’ as the most precious flower of Your Tree. You are the dream of all your ancestors ” ~Bert Hellinger

Be the dreams of your ancestors, not their trauma, pain and isolation. Dare to dream!